THIS IS JENIM… AND YOU THOUGHT YOU KNEW HER. (@scarville)

thisisjenim
I find release from my own personal dramas when I am able to express them as universal. As a writer, I help others make sense of the human experience. I’m so quickly shaped by my relationships to others.

I am a seeker of wisdom.
In my youth, I possess a quality of being “wise beyond my years.” As an adult, I’m
known for being an unusually deep thinker, always searching for truth and meaning. I’m a philosopher, comfortable in the world of my mind, and I often prefer my own thoughts to a superficial dialogue with other people. Very sentimental, sensual, loyal, vulnerable, thoughtful, extremely shy.

I am strong-willed, and seek out quiet, tranquil environments.
Over-imaginative and prone to fantasy, sometimes trying to shape my life to fit some romantic ideal. I love unreservedly, giving much and asking little in return.
I’m closely in touch with my feelings, and in tune with the nuances and subtleties in my environment that others won’t even notice. I approach life and understand it through my emotions. I don’t intellectualize about things; I respond exactly how I feel. I’m very attuned to my feelings. An intense sensitivity permits me to experience the heights of emotional bliss, but it can also take me to the depth of despair. Close emotional relationships are essential to my well-being and happiness(and I have none).

I communicate best in non-verbal ways; emotionally, psychically, or through forms as art, dance, music, poetry and photography. I have a natural feel and sense for the arts. I’m apt to let the heart rule the head. Highly impractical and impressionable, sometimes use bad judgment for I’m unable to be objective and evaluate situations impersonally. I may change my mind as often as my moods change, but rarely do the facts sway my beliefs. I’m an enigma, even with those closest to me. Each life experience is remembered as an emotional impression, and held onto forever.

My powerful memory can be woven into story, music and art in a way that pulls at the heartstrings of my audiences or loved ones. The dark side is that I’ll nurture a wound for a long time, sometimes keeping one foot firmly rooted in the past. I also need lots of solitude to calm those turbulent emotional moods I experience, as well as what I pick up like a psychic sponge from others. My imagination is so vivid that it’s like I’m watching home movies inside my head. For me, every life experience can be replayed again and again in Technicolor, and the same internal landscape revisited. This is the raw material for both creative genius, and the tendency to get stuck in the past.

I’m never upfront or showy, making me easy to overlook. What lies beneath the my shell is well hidden and hard to fathom. My perceptions border on psychic, but these insights get clouded by the intensity of feelings, or are altered by my vivid imagination. I swing between kind, caring and compassionate, and tough, prickly and full of self-pity. I’m soft, sensitive, and desperately yearn for approval. Lack the ability to read expiration dates on people, places and things which no longer add any value to my life. I have a memory par excellence. I may not be able to tell you that my best friend’s wedding was on June 18, 2003, but i can surely paint a visual and emotional image regarding the mixture of joy, excitement and sadness I was feeling at that time.

I possess a rich, highly charged inner life deep with reservoirs full of emotional power. I live intensely in the past in memory and in the future in imagination. My memories of the past is outstanding, especially for all things emotional. I have a very sentimental nature, an incurable romantic. I fall into dark depressions. In speech or writing, my mind is largely influenced by the past. My eyes often reveal a painful, shy, hurt or sad expression and are characterized by a drifting, dreamy, watery, moist, child-like quality.

My eyes are like deep mysterious ocean pools, whirlpools of delight, colored by an exuberant expression of luminous receptivity, intelligent curiosity and a beholding wonderment. I have a difficult plot in life in terms of love and relationships. I have the power to conserve, concentrate and conceive. I’m peaceful, fearful. I have intelligence and wisdom, suppleness, and softness. I’m artistic and better with concepts than doing. I have a powerful psyche constantly seeking out the truth using my higher intelligence and creativity.

In the face of adversity I can become very introspective. Often this can become severe and I find that I can’t reach out to the outside world, nor the outside world to me. I exist in an impenetrable emotional dungeon. In these circumstances sleep can be a relief and I remain in bed for long periods at a time. Emotionally, I’m my own worst enemy. I am a shape-shifter. I have the power to change. I’m fluid. I love to learn, and I’m a student my entire life. I’m quick to take in new information and make adjustments. Smart and resourceful.

Like water, I take the shape of any situation that I’m placed in. I’m especially flexible..Calm and peaceful. I learn enough about a thing to satisfy my curiosity, then move on to the next. I do well in jobs where I am continually learning something new, or jobs where I am required to be highly creative. I frequently find myself overwhelmed by emotion. I wear a favorite outfit until it literally falls to pieces. Curious by nature, great creative energy,chaotic by nature. Because my nature is shape-shifting, I appear flighty and unreliable. In truth, my fluidity allows me to be deeply compassionate as I can easily match another’s state of being.

I spend a great deal of time in my imagination, and can be completely satisfied with my personal story without ever actually living it. I am very good at using imagination to explore all the different ways to get to my end result. Once I have explored it in my imagination, the actual task of getting to the finish line may seem overwhelming, or simply be boring, and I may then move on to the next new thing.

I rarely finish what I start. I may feel that I drift through life with great ideas but nothing to show for those ideas. I’m creative, artistic, resourceful at finding and revealing information, highly intuitive. I am energetic, inclusive and recognize change long before it is obvious to others. I find myself continuously reacting to outside events, rather than creating my own life.

Heavily prone to depression.
Highly imaginative.
I honestly don’t know who I am…but these few hold true…I hope to meet me
someday…Till then, this is Jenim…and you thought you knew me.

@scarville

See you, next Monday, same corner.

JenimDibie’s Corner

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3 thoughts on “THIS IS JENIM… AND YOU THOUGHT YOU KNEW HER. (@scarville)

  1. This is a very intresting read, I can relate to d 10th paragraph about being like fluid. Enjoyed it, I also don’t knw who I am o! But I’m learning and picking out paragraphs and lines from other people 🙂

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